Bros before hoes

 Bros before hoes is one of the commandments of the guy code. It is the belief that guys friends (bros) should always come before their relationship with their girlfriends. It is a common belief for guys with this mind frame that girls are a dime a dozen and no reason to neglect your guy friends. And that the relationship with your friends last longer and are more important than the relationship with a women. This rule came about because a group of guys decided that they were sick of their friends putting women before male bonding.

 Guys who buy into this are only excused from this rule if they have a new girlfriend because they have a new toy to play with. Or if they are married because they need to be home to make sure that women do not fill their children with feminist idea’s.

 This whole idea of bros before hoes would be hilarious if it wasn’t common practice among a lot (not all) of young guys. I think it’s really sad way of viewing relationships of your friends, instead of just viewing the women as someone your friend enjoys they are viewed as competition.

SWMS 210 reviews for the mid-term exam

Hi,

For those who have facilitated (or will facilitate for Week 9) section discussions, please write one or two paragraphs to summarize the readings you presented (or will present next week). You can use the "comment" function to post your summary.

Remember to include the names of the authors and the titles of the readings.

Pumping... Looks

For me, watching Pumping Iron presented a new angle of Arnold Schwarzenegger for me that I had never really been conscious about. It was actually somewhat hard to watch the footage, knowing that this person was going to be California's governor. If I would have seen this clip beforehand, maybe I would have influenced more people to vote one direction or the other during California's gubernatorial elections.

One thing that is actually amazing about this competition that is presented in the movie is that the 'hegemonic masculine' guys presented in the documentary are judged not based on strength and how much they can lift - the classification that we always associate with masculinity. Instead, they're judged purely on looks. Schwarzenegger even summarizes that, saying that the competition judges based on muscularity, proportion, and symmetry - not on the amount one can lift.

Another peculiar characteristic about this competition is that the event is extremely erotic - all of the contestants are put on display with as little clothes as possible - in most cases, just a speedo covering up the privates. This gets even more interesting when the audience is analyzed. Who are the most enthusiastic audience members? The men. They are the loudest ones about how much they like the body builders. And the body builders enjoy it! Schwarzenegger even claims that he gets off on this process, saying "I cum all the time." So male viewers are constantly watching him cum. In this sense, the 'manliest' show is extremely homoerotic…

...Which brings me to the final point that I actually appreciate. In John Berger's Ways of Seeing, it is argued that women are always watched, and are thus objectified. In Pumping Iron, the roles are reversed - men are the ones constantly watched. In the opening scenes, the ballet dancer tells Schwarzenegger "They're not just watching you in individual poses, but also as you transition - they're constantly watching." And by constantly being watched, the men are objectified. The movie continues to drive that point home, showing male bodies without the heads, making the statement that it's the body, not the person, that's being examined. Without necessarily realizing it, these bodybuilders are entering the role that's traditionally held by women - being an object on display.

Masculinities

Masculinity is possessing qualities or characteristics considered typical of or appropriate to a man. The term can be used to describe any human, animal or object that has the quality of being masculine. Different men show their masculinity in different ways. Some men find themselves obliged to possess qualities and perform acts that the rest of the men do in order to be considered masculine. There is also a category of males who, disregarding what the rest of the males in society consider right, think carefully and conservatively before making a decision or performing an act of violence which is considered very masculine. A good example of this is very well displayed in John Singleton's movie "Boyz N The Hood"(1991). The protagonist, Trè Styles (Cuba Gooding Jr.) had grown up in a neighborhood filled with violence and gangster relations. Almost all of his friends are involved in shootings and have guns and constantly drink alcohol to be considered "manly", however, Trè, raised from a young age by his father Furious Styles (Laurence Fishburne) who he considers a very good role model, does not resort to the acts of violence even when he loses his temper and thinks calmly and carefully to avoid engaging in acts of violence and living a normal life. 
Men have different ways of showing their masculinities and no one has to resort to acts of violence to be considered masculine. Every man can show his masculinity in his own manner.

A Riddle...

I'd like to start this blog post with a riddle:

A father and son are driving across a railroad track when the car suddenly stalls and gets hit by an incoming train. The father is killed on impact, and the child is rushed to the hospital in a critical condition. There, the surgeon, upon sight of the patient, says "I can't operate on this child because that's my son." How is that possible?

I was asked this riddle during a longer car ride evenly divided within gender, and even though I already knew the answer, it was interesting to watch how surprisingly long it took the people in the car to come up with the solution.

One thing that was recently mentioned before class and angered me was the announcement of a bone marrow drive. The announcement reminded me of the Red Cross' archaic restriction on blood donations for gay people who, according to them, are "at higher risk of having AIDS." There are constantly small restrictions like that in place in society that create gender inequality and sexuality inequality.

However, society is continuously working towards breaking down those legal inequalities. What concerns me most are the inequalities embedded in peoples' minds - the thoughts that make solving this riddle difficult for my friends.

The answer to the riddle? The surgeon is the boy's mother.

Definition of Masculinity

                Masculinity is an idea that has been portrayed in the media in several different ways. After watching the movie “I Love You Man” I saw several of the modern views of masculinity. It isn’t until the protagonist, Pete, is about to wed, that he is awaken from the reality that he has no guy friends. All of a sudden the fear that something may be wrong with him grows within those that are close to him. Through the course of the film, he is seen as weird and even gay due to the fact that his only friends have always been girls. His character portrays a different type of masculinity that trespasses the boundaries that society imposes on males. This film portrays what happens when a male is not into what a man should be, such as beer, muscles and talk about women.

It isn’t until he meets Sydney that he begins to travel on a journey to find his masculinity. As the film continues we find that what was once considered the ideal male, may no longer be today. Though his feminine tendencies and the masculine traits he ought to acquire, Pete realizes that there is a middle ground. This middle ground is what many search for today as well. It is no better for a man to be too masculine that it is to be too feminine. Males who portray machismo are seen as jerks or oppressors and those that are feminine are seen as feeble and often times, gay. Therefore, the film shows that today we take on a different version of masculinity. This supports the idea that terms are constantly changing. The definition of masculinity changed to include aspects of both man and women. 

Why do straight women love bromance?

I have been watching Queer As Folk and it is one of my all time favorite TV series, and I also watched a lot of films and fictions depicting homosexual love. Clearly I am not the only straight girl who find herself standing awkwardly in the "gay world". It is kind of a "queer" phenomenon and I sometimes can not help asking myself this question--why do some heterosexual women, like me, love bromance so much?

Every time when I get excited about bromance I try hard to find a reason for my weird and "straight" love towards gay men; although at first I didn't think it make any sense at all. But there must be some reasons lying behind it, especially when it seems so unnatural. In order to justify my behavior, first I cut bromance into two essential elements: two men and their love.

It is easy to account for the "love" part: every one seeks for love, and love is the forever topic in  art works. But how the love of heterosexual people different from that of straight individuals? I guess what is lying there is that gay people often face more obstacles in their journey to love. The pressure and responsibility from society and family block the love between same sex, but also enrich it with mind-shaking struggles and heart-moving loyalty, which is even amplified in films and art. This is what strikes straight women and raises their sympathies--the bold and unlimited  love.

But why does it have to be two men? We can not deny that lesbians as well as a few straight couples encounter the same amount of pressure from society. My account for this is their sex orientation and the boredom of stereotype in a traditional heterosexual relationship. The first part explains why love of lesbians fails to attract straight women; although it may not apply to all the cases.(I watch lesbian movies and whatnot as well, probably because I unconsciously want to be "fair") When it comes to straight couples,  I guess it is the unchanging relationship that is losing the audience. Some women hate to be portrayed as weak, emotional and delicate; and this is sadly still the norm in literature and film industry. Whenever in a book or a movie I see a dependant and helpless girl crying and complaining I just cannot help letting out a sigh. This is why generally a "moving" love of straight couples can hardly evoke my empathy to the same level as an equal relationship between gay men does, which is ironic when I realise that I am technically still straight.